Well I guess I just can't keep up with this whole blogging thing consistently. I'm not sure what I am doing with my time, but it seems some days I just don't have enough of it (or energy). I don't know how I used to fit this in once a week way back when. Mostly I can't figure out what the heck I talked about! But get ready, I'll give it to you this week!
I really can't stop thinking about time lately. Ever since I turned 30 I feel like my life has been on fast forward. This might have something to do with a baby coming 2 weeks after, but still. I find myself all the time thinking 'would everybody just SLOW DOWN for a minute! Alli put on some jeans yesterday and I almost wanted to get mad at her because they were floods. Sage is 4 stinkin months old already!
I know it is so lame and I sound like a Grandma when I talk like this, but this has been on my mind lately. I just want my kids to stay still and be kids like this forever! Because I feel this way, I sometimes let things slide around the house. Last night we had a late supper and after at 7:30 (the kids are usually in bed around 8) we all went over to my parents house to play on the wii until 9:30. The kids loved it and I did too and I'm pretty sure Grandma and Grandpa always love a visit! Derek was tired and was like what the heck are you doing because we did the same thing on Sunday and had been out kinda late the whole week frankly because there is no school this week. But sometimes the day gets away and I just want to do something fun with the kids and my kids are at an age where if they stay up late here and there they still function the next day. (they get that from Derek not me!)
Anyway, what I am saying is that I do want to seize the day. Did you see that article a while back that was floating around? I thought it was great. I'm too lazy to find it and link it. But it was good from what I remember of it a month ago. However, when the old ladies tell me to savor the moment and it goes by to fast I really honestly do try to. I genuinely do appreciate the reminder. It is always a good reminder even when you feel like the tamer of the circus at the zoo! I love my kids in this crazy outta control wanna hug and kiss and squeeze and hold them forever kind of way, I also want to spank them sometimes, I don't but it sure has crossed my mind and I don't think there is anything wrong with feeling that way. I love my kids 100% of the time but I do believe it is ok to breathe a sigh of relief when dad walks in the door or when they are all tucked in bed for the night.
I feel like I am working so hard to raise kind respecting children. I feel those are 2 very powerful traits to have and I am so very happy when I see my kids act this way...on occasion, but I realize they are children. I would be a liar if I said I am a perfect mother who makes supper every night complete with all the food groups for my obedient kids and all we do is hug and kiss and laugh and play and learn and stay up late playing the wii all the time. It isn't realistic to be happy with your kids all the time, it's hard for me to write that, but it's true. At the same time I sure hope my kids do remember the late night family bike rides or going out for ice cream and not when I am pulling my hair out in the grocery store line talking to them through my gritted smiling teeth or telling them 17 times to hurry up and put on their coats and shoes and get going with a slightly raised voice. That's what I want to remember.
My time is going on like it always has, I just have more things besides myself to fill it. I wouldn't have it any other way. I love the things that fill my time and I guess I just hope that whatever it is that I am doing is worthwhile.
Now let's not end so seriously or I might not get any comments. I sang a song to James the other day about all the things he likes to do so he and Alli sang one to me. It included such things as yoga, Primary, Sage, running, quiet kids, (hehe, I do shush them more than usual in our small quarters when Sage is sleeping) your friends, sleeping and doing crafts with Rhonda. I think they summed up what I am doing with my time pretty good! Although I feel like I should get credit for doing crafts with them because I only crafted with Rhonda once in recent memory and I'm not sure how they even knew I did that and I pull out that craft box with them regularly!